Filed under: Celebrities, Events, Moopiechops, Movie Reviews, movies, television | Tags: animated, animation, clone wars, lucas, star wars
Did you know that there was a Star Wars Preseq,middle of the- umm its somewhere before Leia gets knocked up and its after Padame becomes enamored with a kid who is at least 7 years younger than her. Lucas loves out of the norm sexual relations: Luke and Leia…. Padame and Annie…. (made that lezzy on prpose- lucase should have as well)
In Lucas’s long struggle against acting, he has finally found a medium that will get rid of any shed of human relation to the screen actor. He almost accomplished this with his choice to have Hayden Christensen play Anakin Skywalker. I would have rather seen the little kid do the whole series, as annoying as he was he was a slightly better actor, and it would have been hysterical to see him in the Vader suit at the end. The only thing better would be to put Jonah Hill in the Vader suit at the end and have him make some bionic cock joke.
This one is a totally animated adventure and discusses the time of the clone wars. I’m mildly interested. However, a quote from Lucas, in the Los Angeles Times Article, worries me, “There really isn’t any story to tell there,” the filmmaker said.. Truth be told George, we kinda knew that already. He also goes on to say that this transformation of Anakin into Darth is really the interesting part of the tale. Yes, maybe it could have been, but you already fucked that up with Revenge of the Sith. Truly did anyone really go see that movie to see the transformation of Anakin, or did we go to see an hour of Darth Vader killing off Jedis. Dissappointed again, but I wont vent on the old SW movies here. (I know… too late)
The cartoon- I mean, animated film will have a follow up television show. Fuck- in my desperation and hope for something that resembles the original series ill end up wasting my time and watching these. Damn you Lucas- you wizard, how do you make me watch your crap.
And when i do- did it! I’ll post that magnificent review right here!
Oh enchanted your my little wicked pantless elf, running the four seasons through my living room. My wife picked this movie- and i pleaded with her not to, i said honey, there are only two things that can happen when we watch this; 1. I hate it, and you love it, and you hate me for hating it, (think back to Sex in the City, Medium, Queer as Folk, Where the boys arent
- oh no wait, i loved that one….2. I love it and you think im gay- end of marriage, however possibility of getting in better shape and going to boys town. I love boys town, all the tight pants and Hanes snuggies. Its like a winter wonderland with balls as Xmas ornaments.
Alright i’ve scared myself enough. I really did try to hate this movie- i really tried hard, and there are plenty of moments where Patrick Dempsey is on screen and you think to yourself what an ass- not like in the gay way, as in Ooooh snuggle those shorts over here, what an ass- but the, what an ass on the douche bag side of assness. Well, i couldnt hate it. Not Dempsies ass- that i hate, but the movie i couldnt. It was well enough done and made light of the usually disney crap enough that i giggled like a sexually confused waxed chested little boy- yes my wife made me wax before we watched this, and Uncle Billy was there too- really weird night.
Anyway the movie is: Cartoon, song dance, real life, song dance, big fight, the end. Some dance scenes i swear were right out of Batman and Robin- they were gay.
One thing to mention is the main character, as all princesses in Disney movies, has a alarmingly close relationship with the wild kingdom. She has the ability, through song and dance of course, to make the animals do her bidding. For instance in one scene she decides she needs to clean- cue the whistle, cue the music- bam pigeons and rats clean the house. I was wondering what would happen if you placed her in the woods, and beat her a bit, just so shes bleeding a little. Then cue the hungry bear. Nature versus nurture, whistle and sing, rip and tear……
I did enchanted and enchanted did me back- i dont think i would watch it again, but i know i will. Especially since my wife already said “lets watch it again!”
Filed under: Eatings | Tags: Access Hollywood, alcohol, alley, barney's beanery, beer, beverage, dessert, drink, food, fries, garlic fries, Gordon Biersch, hamburger, NBA Playoffs, Oreo, outside seating, paper mache, Pasadena, Pottery Barn, service
Last Saturday I hit Gordon Biersch in Pasadena to catch the NBA Playoffs. Gordon Biersch was hard to find as it is buried down an alley. But it is easier to find than the Barney’s Beanery in Pasadena, which I had intended on going to but could not locate after taking a wrong turn.
Once you do locate the alley, you walk down into a really nice outside seating area. Only problem . . . the place was empty. Dead. No matter. We were headed for the bar to watch the game anyway. Only problem . . . this bar is where husbands go to die. Seated at the bar were a bunch of men, by themselves, with shopping bags from women’s stores hidden at their feet. This is where husbands came to escape the further torture of seeing yet another fucking paper mache rooster at the Pottery Barn that would go just great in the French country home their wives were slowly erecting to serve as their dungeons. These men were so defeated that when we got there, they were watching Access Hollywood. We quickly changed that.
Now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, let me tell you what else blows about this bar. Besides the immasculated men, the place was full of super-masculine women. My friend thought there were some burly lesbos hanging out in front of us. I just thought they were large and unattractive women. Tomato. Toe-mah-toe.
Gordon Biersch does have pretty much anything you could want to drink. They even brew their own beers. I tried the special, which was quite refreshing even to me . . . and I am not a beer drinker.
The food, however, sucked. I tried the simple approach figuring who could screw up a burger and fries. Oooh! Oooh! I know! I know! Gordon Biersch can. The burger had no flavor and was really greasy. The tomato on it was overripe. The fries were the worst part. They were coated in garlic. In fact, there was so much damn garlic on the fries that I had to order dessert to get the disgusting flavor out of my mouth. Notice that you can infer from this statement that although the fries sucked, I ate them.
For dessert I had some sort of peanut butter, chocolate, Oreo, concoction. It was enough to almost redeem the place. Almost. But it just couldn’t salvage all of the above plus the extremely unattractive waitresses. Although the 22-year-old hostess with the . . . how shall I say . . . spring-loaded body made up for that. And the service was pretty impressive. Our waitress was very attentive and had a fun personality.
One more weird note . . . the place was a haven for MILFs.
You’ll find tons of parking in the various parking structures around Colorado Blvd. But if I were you, I’d try some other restaurant or bar on the street.
Gordon Biersch . . . I’d rather die than do this again.
Filed under: Eatings | Tags: alcohol, bar, bar stool, beer, Cinco de Mayo, drink, Father's Office, food, frat, restaurant, santa monica, valet, wait
Last night I took a date to Father’s Office on Montana in Santa Monica for a little Cinco de Mayo action. I gotta’ tell you that I was really surprised that the place had nothing special going on for the holiday. No deals on Mexican beer. No discounts. Nothing. Not even a lousy pinata.
Where to begin? For starters, there was no valet when I got there at 7 p.m. There was, however, ample street parking, but I doubt that would be the case later on in the evening.
When I walked into the place, I was surprised by how cramped it felt inside. The place is literally the size of my father’s office. And as the night went on, the place got packed. So, it got really warm in there, which I guess is smart because then you order more cold beer of which they have a massive selection. In fact, I think the selection is too big. I’d rather they had less beer and more options of other beverages.
I hear the food is great at this place, but I wasn’t eating. And to tell you the truth, the odor of the food coming from other tables was enough to make me never want to visit this bar again. The place absolutely stunk of onions. Even my beer mug smelled when I went to take my first drink.
You know what else I didn’t like? The bar stools are in terrible shape. The floor is uneven in the bar and the stools are loose and don’t balance well. I almost fell off mine before I even started drinking. I noticed a few other people having the same problem. Also, I could only see one television in the place. So, choose elsewhere if you’re looking to watch the big game.
One plus was that the girls in the joint were pretty cute. The guys seemed to be ex-frat types. Read into that what you will. And by 8:30 pm, there wasn’t room for anyone. If it’s a table that you’re after, you better get there early or wear comfy shoes for your wait.
Father’s Office . . . I’d rather die than do this again.
