didordied


Gordon Biersch – Hard to Find – Harder to Stay by vinceklortho

 

Last Saturday I hit Gordon Biersch in Pasadena to catch the NBA Playoffs.  Gordon Biersch was hard to find as it is buried down an alley.  But it is easier to find than the Barney’s Beanery in Pasadena, which I had intended on going to but could not locate after taking a wrong turn.

Once you do locate the alley, you walk down into a really nice outside seating area.  Only problem . . . the place was empty.  Dead.  No matter.  We were headed for the bar to watch the game anyway.  Only problem . . . this bar is where husbands go to die.  Seated at the bar were a bunch of men, by themselves, with shopping bags from women’s stores hidden at their feet.  This is where husbands came to escape the further torture of seeing yet another fucking paper mache rooster at the Pottery Barn that would go just great in the French country home their wives were slowly erecting to serve as their dungeons.  These men were so defeated that when we got there, they were watching Access HollywoodWe quickly changed that.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, let me tell you what else blows about this bar.  Besides the immasculated men, the place was full of super-masculine women.  My friend thought there were some burly lesbos hanging out in front of us.  I just thought they were large and unattractive women.  Tomato.  Toe-mah-toe. 

Gordon Biersch does have pretty much anything you could want to drink.  They even brew their own beers.  I tried the special, which was quite refreshing even to me . . . and I am not a beer drinker.

The food, however, sucked.  I tried the simple approach figuring who could screw up a burger and fries.  Oooh!  Oooh!  I know!  I know!  Gordon Biersch can.  The burger had no flavor and was really greasy.  The tomato on it was overripe.  The fries were the worst part.  They were coated in garlic.  In fact, there was so much damn garlic on the fries that I had to order dessert to get the disgusting flavor out of my mouth.  Notice that you can infer from this statement that although the fries sucked, I ate them. 

For dessert I had some sort of peanut butter, chocolate, Oreo, concoction.  It was enough to almost redeem the place.  Almost.  But it just couldn’t salvage all of the above plus the extremely unattractive waitresses.  Although the 22-year-old hostess with the . . . how shall I say . . . spring-loaded body made up for that.  And the service was pretty impressive.  Our waitress was very attentive and had a fun personality. 

One more weird note . . . the place was a haven for MILFs. 

You’ll find tons of parking in the various parking structures around Colorado Blvd.  But if I were you, I’d try some other restaurant or bar on the street.

Gordon Biersch . . . I’d rather die than do this again. 

 

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Not My Father’s Office by vinceklortho

 

Father's Office

 

Last night I took a date to Father’s Office on Montana in Santa Monica for a little Cinco de Mayo action.  I gotta’ tell you that I was really surprised that the place had nothing special going on for the holiday.  No deals on Mexican beer.  No discounts.  Nothing.  Not even a lousy pinata.

Where to begin?  For starters, there was no valet when I got there at 7 p.m.  There was, however, ample street parking, but I doubt that would be the case later on in the evening.

When I walked into the place, I was surprised by how cramped it felt inside.  The place is literally the size of my father’s office.  And as the night went on, the place got packed.  So, it got really warm in there, which I guess is smart because then you order more cold beer of which they have a massive selection.  In fact, I think the selection is too big.  I’d rather they had less beer and more options of other beverages.

I hear the food is great at this place, but I wasn’t eating.  And to tell you the truth, the odor of the food coming from other tables was enough to make me never want to visit this bar again.  The place absolutely stunk of onions.  Even my beer mug smelled when I went to take my first drink.

You know what else I didn’t like?  The bar stools are in terrible shape.  The floor is uneven in the bar and the stools are loose and don’t balance well.  I almost fell off mine before I even started drinking.  I noticed a few other people having the same problem.  Also, I could only see one television in the place.  So, choose elsewhere if you’re looking to watch the big game.

One plus was that the girls in the joint were pretty cute.  The guys seemed to be ex-frat types.  Read into that what you will.  And by 8:30 pm, there wasn’t room for anyone.  If it’s a table that you’re after, you better get there early or wear comfy shoes for your wait.

Father’s Office . . . I’d rather die than do this again.

 



The Other Room by vinceklortho

Last Thursday night, I hit The Other Room in Venice.  It’s a dark wine and beer bar that seemed to have everything on the menu.

The good news is that finding free street parking was fairly easy.  If you can’t find any, they have valet.

The place is open air, so bring a trendy hoodie ’cause it gets chilly in Venice at night.  It attracts what appeared to be young professionals with disposable income.

I ordered a small Fat Tire, which cost me $7.  My date ordered a glass of Pinot Grigio, which also cost me $7.  I didn’t see food on the menu, but the people at the table next to us came in armed with a pizza and plates from elsewhere, which no one batted an eye at.

Here’s the upside to the joint.  You can take a date here and she’ll definitely like the vibe and be impressed because it combines the beach with a little class.  But if you do bring a date, watch where those eyes are darting because the place was full of hot chicks when I went.

The downside . . . the service is atrocious.  The waitress didn’t take our drink order until about 15 minutes had elapsed since our arrival.  And boy, do they make it known when you stop buying drinks that they want you out.  The waitress also took 20 minutes to bring me my bill once I asked for it.

So, arrive before 8:30 p.m. if you want a shot at a table and free parking.  The music is a little loud, but not so loud that you can’t carry on a conversation.  And you should probably dress LA trendy if you want to blend in with the crowd.

The Other Room . . . I did it . . . and you should too!

 



Barney’s Beanery by moopiechops

Barney’s Beanery may not be the place for lunch for everyone but it was the place for lunch for me today. My darling wife and i met our friend FF at BB and chowed down. The food there is mediocre at best however when finely tuned with the appropriate amount of beers the meals get much better.

The one we went to is on 3rd street however they do have a few locations around town. The setting is typical bear hall with seating for the eaters. It was a nice day so we sat outside and with ample shade and a warm day the scene was quite nice.

I got the cheeseburger which was ordered medium and came well done just the way i like it. FF had french toast which didnt seem to bother her too much, but then again shes easy. Mccy had enchiladas which looked good, however the eggs were liquid and the beans were dry

The one saving grace for BB is that they do have a great selection of beer and if you get there at the right time and order the right beer it wont be flat. Yes, the first one i ordered from the draught was flat, but once i altered my choice the suds fell neatly into my belly. Its not always that ill have a day where i can take a 2 hour lunch and have four beers, but today was exactly that day.

Barney’s gets a 1 out of 5 for the food and a 3 out of 5 for the beer (more for the selection than the quality really)